What to Do When You Don't Get the Job or Promotion

stick ya chest out, keep your chin up

'cause sometimes you gotta get knocked down to get up

mystikal - bouncin’ back

Let’s talk about resilience, the art of bouncing back.

It’s a given that when you’re aiming for something, inevitably you’ll miss. Anytime we really want something, there’s a heightened sense that if it fails, we don’t know what we’d do. We’re reliant on this thing working out. Happening. Being real.  

It’s human nature. It’s also natural that not everything works out the way we hoped it would. 

Opportunities show up months later, often clothed in a way we didn’t expect. People don’t do what they said they would do. Businesses go on hiring freezes right after we apply.

It’s painful, and we’ve all been there. Here’s a few ways to cope:

Accept the situation.

Whenever you feel rejected, disappointed or frustrated, one of the key things to NOT do is to associate your identity with the event.

You are an ideal candidate, even if this opportunity did not work out. 

You are promotion worthy, even if you were passed for it this time. 

See how this goes? 

Try to have a balanced, realistic view of things. It did not work out this time, but you can try again. 

Reframe it as an opportunity to learn.

Anytime we hear a ‘no’ or a ‘not now,’ it's a common reaction to feel angry or deflated about it. But the true opportunity is to ask what did you learn?

• Even if you don't understand why you're having an experience, what can you gain from it? 

• Did you get exposed to an organization you know you would love to work for? 

• Did you realize you're qualified for a different type of job you hadn't considered previously? 

This is information that you did not have prior to this experience. View these new learnings as wins that inform what you do next. 

In the words of the great Nelson Mandela, “I never lose. Either I win, or I learn.”

Improve, and test again.

After you’ve assessed what you’ve learned, develop your course of action. Is there anything you’d do differently the next time? 

If you applied to a job and was invited to an interview, that’s an indication that your resume is solid. What did you learn from the interview process? Is this the type of company you want to continue to target, or would you like to aim for a smaller company, or a company that does similar work, but in a different industry? Pivot based on those learnings and then apply again. 

Resilient people find alternate courses to success. They don’t quit. Accept, reflect on what you’ve learned, and keep at it.